i had no idea whether is it a good idea to tell him or not.
but in fact, i already did.
whatever i said about others always come true.
but when it comes to myself, its always the opposite way.
should i feel sad for myself or happy for others.
i no longer feeling anything.
i'm cool when she told me all those.
i'm also cool when he told me all those.
i didnt felt anything. is it because im prepared?
or im numb. numb to them.
i punched my fist against the wall. red patches formed.
but it cant take away the feeling inside me.
i felt weird. its a feeling that wont go away.
i didnt slp last night. stayed awake whole night.
lying on the bed till 5 plus then went to bath.
it was raining when i stepped out of the house. but i didnt take umbrella.
i just walked the path under the rain. how i wish i could cry.
im unable to cry since last night. even im feeling all sucky and stuff.
i need to vent it out. otherwise i would go bonkers!!
someone just make me cry. let me cry so that i can feel better.
maybe after crying, i would pick myself up.
im now going to occupy myself with lots and lots of stuff...
whatever things u need help just ask me.
the proposal, workplan, activities for the camp, trainings, competition, PP proposal
im going to put all my heart and soul into all these things.
i dont want to think so much. just pretend everything is normal.
nothing is happening. too tired to think and dont wish to think.
[ I like it when its raining ]
cause no 1 cares about you, as they just care for themselves.
cause no 1 will notice that you were crying.
cause its so peaceful outside as people are all hiding in shelters.
and most important, is that Im alone right now.
