the ball is with me right now.
just emo-ing for no reason.
no idea why im feeling so down.
i might and might not know the reason.
everything seems so messed up right now.
i feel so insecure. im uncertain that why i feel that way.
the cut on my hand might not seem deep but it does hurt.
somehow it resembles my heart.
everything seem normal but it might be breaking into pieces.
somehow i wish to forget it. forget it man.
im tired. i want to give up right now.
tired of getting up.
just get it off me.
its been a bad day yesterday.
had no idea. but everyone's mood is so down.
and im feeling sucky.
there are times i may seem not to bother it but serious im thinking it alot.
why are they behaving in this manner?
but what i think is nothing. what can i do?
there seems nothing that i can do.
if i cant do anything shall i just give up?
but if everyone thinks this way. what is going to happen?
im back to my old self. thinking thinking thinking.
today accidentally cut myself.
on my palm. i felt nothing.
getting cut yet felt nothings wrong.
this kinda make me feel like cutting myself once more.
had no idea why i want to do that. but i just want to do that.
promises were made to people that i would not do that.
but could i do it?
no. should i say did people keep their promise at the first place?
what are promises?
to me its something important that is between me and that person.
is something that bonds us together not wanting us to break apart.
this may sound pointless for the other party, but it meant alot to me.
its define how important i am in that person's world/heart.
still had no idea what the message is about.
figuring it for the whole day. but no use.
maybe its trying to say. words are not important.
the things u do are better than the words u say.
is that it? had no idea as there is no 1 to answer that back to me.
gotta stand up. in order to be strong. Smilex Through It. =]
hope i can do it.
yios~~ im back to update.
saturday is my first competition.
well, i got up early in the morning after i jerked awake numerous times.
maybe it im too nervous. about how am i going to do in competition.
dont wish to blog too much about it.
just think that i didnt do well on that day.
so going to get my form right.
went out yesterday with ah zhou to PS.
went to eat subway.the Double choco chip is sweet!! but nice.. Gee.
went to watch movies. Gridiron Gang
based on true life story! woo!! nice movie!
Gotta watch it!
Thanks alot for cheering me up. and I have a clear CONSCIENCE!!
haas. something happen after we watched the movie.
after we watched the movie, we find our way out to the exit.
but ah zhou went the wrong way, and got a couple followed us.
haas. monkey see monkey do. lolx..~ then on the way down.
saw the couple in the lift!! Omg!! i just burst of laughing!!
cant tahan..!! hahas!!! serious..i kept laughing all the way.
then on the train took pictures.
then now in class doing nothing. wahaha.
yang sent me a song. Hoobastank - Dont Tell Me
Don't tell me that you are ready to change.
Don't tell me that from now it won't be the same.
It doesn't matter, 'cause at the end of the day,
It isn't what you say, it's what you do!
YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
What you say will be forgotten someday.
What you do will be remembered.
Empty promises always fade away.
What you keep will last forever.
Don't tell me you'll make things better for us.
Don't tell me that you're some one I can trust.
It doesn't mean a thing to me just because,
It isn't what you say, it's what you do!
Your actions will speak louder than you!
What you say will be forgotten someday.
What you do will be remembered.
Empty promises always fade away.
What you keep will last forever.
So show me that you really figured it out.
And show me everything that you are about.
But if you can't then you should just shut your mouth!..
'cause I don't care what you say or what you do,
You can't take back what you've put me through.
Your actions will speak louder than you!..
What you say will be forgotten someday.
What you do will be remembered.
Empty promises always fade away.
What you keep will last forever.
What you say will be forgotten someday.
What you do will be remembered.
Empty promises always fade away.
What you keep will last forever.
What you keep will last forever.
What you keep will last forever.
Forever...
thats the lyrics. meaningful.
and of cause im stupid!! okie..
im lousy at getting hints!!
but what i know is from the song i know is 'actions speaks louder than words'
what we do will be remember, but what we said would fade away.
haix..yang. cheer up kies? stand up. but what i said may mean nothing to u.
but Jia you.
hasnt been updating my blog
its going to have spider web sooner or later
haas. so shall update today, since my mood is not bad.
well, for the past 2 days, my mood wasnt good, was quite down.
but not for the moment, so shall forget it.
today for no reason just feel like bickering with people.
so please tolerate me ar. lolx..
then went to donate blood today!!!!
woot!! finally got to donate this time!!
damn happy lar!!! that nurse found my vein!
then i kept walking here and there. -_-
make me so ps lar.. haas. but she found my vein.
so nvm..~
then was doing my ppt at the agora hall. no reception there lar.
faints~ soon it was my turn to get poke! haas.
tranfusion lar. the doctor came by and say this song is specially for you.
lolx..damn random. lolx.. but i think he see me nervous and lonely ba.
haas. then he talked to me when the nurse gave me the painkiller injection.
somehow to distract me ba. felt a tini weeny pain nia. so its fine lar.
then he played the song "I will survive" when the nurse inserted the needle for the blood to flow
haas. he say i will survive. Thanks Doc.! lolx.
and making me laugh when u say the nurse will dance after that.
haas. anyways its fun..fun to donate blood. shall donate blood the next time.
and my bag of blood is damn fast lar. lolx..within minutes. im done!
updating my blog.
friday was with my classmates.
pon that geek fac class.
long time want to pon his class liao!!!!
then kana a group..-_-
nadia, sean, samantha and zhi qiang.
thank god!!! so much for helping me!!
dont mind that then i went to find the puppies.
they just make me forget some things.
they are just like babies. new to everything.
always trying to bite people.
they are just cute. name the fattest xiao pang!
my ex was called xiao pang. faints~
nvm it.
today was disappointed.
REALLY really disappointed.
fell to the ground.
not even in the mood to smile.
got back home. went to bath and sleep.
just want to do nothing but sleep.
the rest trying to cheer me up.
but im not budging.
im back to the hole that i just came out.
all these while, what am i doing?
am i just wasting my time?
or just doing some random stuff?
not in the mood to blog.
wanted to write out my feelings.
but my feelings are indescribable.
so forget it.
anyways, archers please jia you!
you guys can do it.
dont fall into a pit like me.
its terrible. u might not even stand up.
even if u want.
thats all i wanta to say today.
haas new hairstyle of hers! wahaha
doggie sleeping~
the puppies found at the training ground~ so cute! but they do bite! haas
nice back ground eh?! haas.
ice cream is nice!! ah zhou's treat!!
couples together~ wahaha
nice eh? haas. we were at the fountain of wealth..~
stupid fellow who ask us to quiet down!! idoit GAY!!! 
elmo is so cute!! lalalala~~ 
hahas.. ah zhou and hwee min.~ so sweet~ =] 
culprit and victimtoad faces of DORY!! wahahaha..!!
Monday, the last day for my shift at CSM.
So going to miss the times over there when we were having fun.
Haas. Nod but its tiring as well.
Today lots of school came, and there are a lot of students.
Really A LOT! I’m so dead by explaining to them what they are supposed to do and why there is a missing square.
Apparently, quite a few hit on the spot. Haas. And some saw it on the MRT. Lolx.. good observation. Haas. Then didn’t went for lunch.
Too many students then seems like not enough people like that.
Then I stay on loe, since I wasn’t feeling hungry anyway.
Saw hwee min, dory and Winnie came.
They just have to come ka jiao my booth. -_-
Embarrass me in front of those sec students.
Kns. So paiseh lar. Faint~
Nvm, then whats worse is that they together with my fac! Tag team!!
They ruin my reputation!! Have to pull hyder, vennon in..-_-
Please! PLEASE do NOT believe~!!!!
Arr..!! my life is so pathetic!! Theres no 1 to help me!! Cry!!
Then they went on to other booths to check out.
Then I continue my shift. Was kind of bored lar when there is no1
But when there is people, I felt tired. Haas.
Contradicting sia~ nvm..
Then ji yuan and ah pa came!! Haas. Saw them lolx..
They didn’t change much. Lolx.. okie..just ji yuan didn’t change much!
Same old pervert ah pek! Nv shave lar.
See!! Make people think u so old nv give u brochures. Haas!
Or bi gd! This teach u to shave!! And its not cool!
Looks like some dirty old ah pek want to see mei mei then go poly walk around! Haas.
Then called dory up to settle the time to meet tmr.
Settle liao. Hweemin husband, moses came by.
He just have to ka jiao lar! -__- think my reputation not ruin enough ar?!
Shit moses!! Arr..!!!
Resumed my shift. Was quite empty liao lar.
The fac say we could pack up soon, im so damn happy lar!!
Haas. Then after awhile pack up and went to eat KFC.
Was not hungry at all loe. But still ate the zinger burger meal.
Damn full lar. Stomach going to burst like that.
Then after that went to walk around causeway point.
Bought a notepad. Needed 1 so bought. $1.30
Haas. Always buying notepad when I’m freaking pissed with life.
So u can find a lot of notepads in my room.
My mum is so going to scream at me.
Just got this habit of buying stationery. No idea why.
Weird me! Haas..but nvm. That’s me!!!
Going to fujitsu to change the adaptor or fix the adaptor for jimmy.
Then later will be going for movies~ wee.!
Haix..my freaking stomach is giving me problems again.
Cant it just give me a break?! Doctors just say rest well and don’t skip meals. Don’t give it any discomfort by skipping and then eating a lot.
Maybe I should change to eat regularly. =/ stomach pain pain =/
Give me a break!!! *sobs*
Tuesday. went to fujitsu with jimmy dory Winnie hwee min to help jimmy change the adaptor. Cause his 1 like spoil liao then his warranty expired liao so asked dory for help. Stunt loe -_- haas. Then wait for quite some time in the end didn’t get to change. Smart. Then went to eat KFC, then ah zhou meet us there. Then we eat liao went to suntec. Sit the shuttle bus. Wah.. we were having fun lar. Then got 1 damn gay fellow! Asked us to keep it down. This is a public place! Okie?! Wah..damn idiot.. this is a public place that’s why we laugh and talk so LOUD!! Omg! Think his English failed!! Then forget it. We keep coughing and clearing out throat lar. Haas. Somehow wants to irritate him by doing that. Lolx. Then when going to alight, he say thanks guys. We are ladies! Girls! Woman! Hello!! Are u blind too..?! forget it.. then we got off the bus then went to walk walk around. Went to the cinema to watch the ‘ the spirit of the victim’. haas its ah zhous treat!~ Its not that nice lar the story line a bit confusing. A dream in a dream. What the hell… then the cinema damn cold lar. I so damn smart never bring jacket. -_- then got some parts ar actually not scary de. But hor!! Is that hwee min shout and freak me lar. Then she ownself laugh lar. Omg!! We in the cinema the noisiest de lar.. thanks to dory and hwee min. haas. Then that pig head keep ka jiao me and hwee min lar. Kns.. then after the movies went to toy R us to play. Haas. Damn noisy. Play the ball ar. Kana ask by the people there to put back the ball. Haas! Second time!! Wahaha.
Sad case sia. Make me so ps many times in a day. But fun!! then got a call, that yang mookie and wan ting would be coming to suntec to meet us to have dinner together. Went to carrefor to walk, then ah zhou went to buy the kettle? Haas, then after that we went out leaving hwee min in there. Then she joined us liao while waiting for the rest to reach, we went to the fountain of wealth to take photos. Haas. Took a lot of photos there..Went to café latte but not halal then change to Swenson. Woot! Went to eat crayfish pasta. Long time no eat liao, enjoy it sia~ although the crayfish meat a bit little but is nice hor! Then had earthquake! Haas. Then we sort of quiet, haas. No idea why but the atmosphere abit weird weird..~ then after eating went to take shuttle bus back to city hall then mrt back woodlands. Quite tiring haas. But fun!!
couples together~ wahaha
stupid fellow who ask us to quiet down!! idoit GAY!!! 
elmo is so cute!! lalalala~~
culprit and victim
