today sucks sucks sucks.
feeling suckier. haix.
yesterday quarrelled with bro.
couldnt slp at night. keep flipping around. then went to slp around 5 plus.
woke up at 9..reach school around 10 plus ba.
stomach giving me probs. think my stomach flu is back to kill me.
but i also nv care so much. just continue shooting.
played a round of match. woahh..i like statue like that.
so sad lar. my team is like just khai and raymond playing nia.
maybe i not enough slp then sort of quite pek chek of what happen.
but i rest liao. then went to shoot.
damn tired. my elbow something wrong. whatever.
then bball keep hitting my arms. both..~~
sian. after playing bball. all of us went to bath.
im the first to come out. i just lied on the sofa to take a nap.
then bro called me. once again. we quarreled.
CAN HE JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
whats wrong with him!!! i told him i will be home in the evening le..
keep calling and calling!!!
im tired of quarrelling with him le.
then when we reach 7-11 he called again.
whats wrong with him and his calls?!?!
shit him lar!! i just kept quiet. until he hang up on me.
sick and tired. parents are coming back tmr or the day after tmr.
not so sure. haix..when they are around i had more freedom.
then walked to causeway. i had no appetite at all. and i had no mood.
so i went home. dont want to affect other people who were feeling alright.
not feeling good. im not okie. definitely not okay.
so? haas. theres nothing to do except to accept the fact.
thats what im trying to do.
today starting is not a good 1.
as im slping in my parents rm. then in the morning carry my stuff back to my room.
then something terrible happen!!
my charger fell..nvm..picked it up....
then!! my laptop fell!!! right on my TOE!!!
i just screamed!! freaking hell..
the corner of my laptop fell on my toe...
hurt like hell lar..damn sad..
it just doesnt hurt if i dont bend my toe.
then slowly walked to bus stop to go to sch.
cause they say they were going to screen movie.
but while on my way to woodlands.
yang called and asked me want to go peck hse watch anot.
i was like grrr..!! nvm..okie loe..anything.
then went to woodlands. met up with winnie, dory and yang.
went to eat KFC then took a bus to peck house.
while waiting for the bus.
yang suggested that we play role-playing.
im 'everyone' dory is 'Noone' winnie is 'someone' and yang is 'anyone'
haas. and we had to say like a third party.
this is how we spent our journey to tampanies crapping.
we talked and laugh like no1 biz lar..
people stare also dont care. and my stomach ache like hell. -_-
dont know whats wrong with me this few days.
stomach keep giving me probs.
then reached peck house.
watched cello. -_- another dumb show like the host.
basket! waste my time. then watched robinhood.
the sound ar. soft like kns loe..
then going to doze off le loe.
finally we gave up. and i went to play piano.
played tong hua. front part nia. the other part difficult. >.<
then after playing. got a little tired then went back to the sofa to nua~~
haas. the pillow damn nice to hug sia.
then almost fell asleep while the rest playing ps2.
peck was waiting for her mum and the rest are just wasting time.
after we left, went to century square.
the food court nv sell halal food. then walked to the food court at the inter.
but there also nv sell halal food. dots!! how come the food court in tam nv sell halal food!!
omg!! then in the end walked until Prime there. faint lar.
end up eating indian food.
makan mutabak,4 plain pratas,mutton briyani,chicken briyani
haas.thats what we ate.
i eat until damn full lar.
i eat 1 plain prata and 2 slice of mutabak. feel full liao..
but have to eat quite alot.
so squeeze loe. lolx.
then walked dory to mrt. then winnie go to the toilet.
then i walked yang to his bus stop and i crossed the bridge to my bus stop
then reached home. once again. quarrelled with my bro with some nonsensical stuff.
did somethings that i shouldnt have done.
but anyways. its over.
did i done something i shant do today?
would i regret if i nv did it today?
i dont know what to say.
it seems different to me.
okie. this is the question i asked.
am i really helping or just being useless.
they said in some way, im helping.
but i felt useless, no..rather hopeless.
i dont feel any thing that helps.
i rather feel more of me causing the uneasiness.
the feeling just came.
had been feeling this all along.
they knew it. they said i helped.
but i just. had no control over my emotions.
u named it, i had it.
anger, useless, jealous , happy, sad?
i had.
so what if i had?
its useless. meaningless.
these feelings are bottled within me.
ITS DIFFERENT!!
i kept telling myself that.
but it doesnt helps.
i just felt stupid.
ridiculously stupid.
serious. im of no help to anyone.
kaki lost his phone.
he called to tell me that.
suprised that he memorized my number.
gotta survived through all these days without his sms company.
all these that i had done.
are u touched?
or its just something that u dont even bother?
never mind. it doesnt matter that much anyways.
should i say today was a great or bad day?
started off by sending off my family at the airport.
after eating breakfast with them.
then after that went over to mookie house to meet up with peck and mookie.
then reach le. damn hot. went to mookies' room to take a nap.
his room is damn freaking cold. lolx
but damn shiok. after 15 mins of nap.
woke up by mookie's "happy new year"
dumb! lolx..then he showed me and peck a video"love my lips"
lolx..so cute lar..haas.
then we went to the kitchen.while mookie is frying. me and peck is standing there.
looking at him fry the fish. lolx. felt extra~~ >.<
then taste the first 2 fish. quite tasteless.
then used butter to cook. so got abit of taste.
not bad lar. for first try.
then soon dory,winnie,hm and yang came.
but peck have to leave cause she got fyp stuff.
so mookie continued to fry his fish. while the rest of us waiting for food.
then food is ready. we all ate. joked along too.
after eating the food. went into the room to watch videos le.
haas. after watching videos. got sian and played game.
silent library!!! woot! crazy game!
first- thousand fingers [ yang kana ]
second - valley of ...... ( take a book and giab nose de ) [ me kana ]
third - pluck nose hair [ hm kana ]
fourth - use clothes peg giab nose [ yang kana again ]
fifth - use pillow whack face [ me kana again ]
sixth - flick head [ mookie kana ]
seventh - eat chilli [ dory kana ]
eighth - plastic bag [ dory kana again ]
think thats all. afterall the game is fun lar. enough for me to laugh until tear.
the game ends and started to watch movie again.
but end up not watching. and took out the scrabble and played.
then my bro smsed me. just spoiled my day!
arr..end up quarreling with him. he said mean things to me!!
mood turn out for the worst. -_- hid in the blanket. trying to slp
to forget all those nonsense. but couldnt.
then i started to tear under the blanket. gosh. didnt expect that.
-_- but that was for awhile. but mood turn to very sian.
went to BK for dinner. then after that went to playground to rest.
sat down and talked to mookie. he helped me keep my thoughts away.
asked me go find recipe. for chicken. i thought of honey chicken.
haas. cool hor. have to find.
tired day. dont know its fun or what.
time to rest.
there is training today.
right after i bath. i heard thunder!
gosh. what an unlucky day.
damn. then took the umbrella got hole de.
idiot! the 3rd umbrella that i took is like that.
felt damn shitty in the early morning.
then fell aslp on the bus.
damn tired.
then walked to school.
then training as usual.
took the stands. 3 times. haas.
shoulder going to break le. but still put on a strong front.
telling myself i can do it.
haas.
today my shoulder is going to break. still abit sore from the physical training.
think i used the wrong muscle to pull again.
then after training went to causeway point to eat.
quite lot idiot things happen. that yang practically messed up my food!
idiot. and they talked crap about the pronounciation.
faint lar. then sort of pulled mookie into the convo also.
managed to pull him in and he sort of back to normal.
haas. but hes just spacing out lar. -_-
nvm..time~ he needs time. ^^
then we discuss awhile about tmr going to mookie house.
haas.randomly go there and slack. lolx..
so cool lar.~ then tmr going to the airport to send my family.
they going to hongkong~~ so sad.~ lolx...
im holding out my hand.
just for u to reach out.
not only is there my hand. there are other hands too.
but found that u chose the other hand.
^^ im glad.
but at the same time i felt envious.
mixed feeling is what i can say.
i cant say out what i wanted to.
like what he did. say out that hes envious. jealous.
however, that is not going to stay long in my mind.
cause my motive is to help u.
even if i loses u.
im prepared. mentally. physically.
i dont care anymore.
guess u wont see this anyways.
sooner or later. hope u will understand why we did this.
not because we need to.
but its because we want to.
i will give u time. all the time that u want.
just dont push us away.
this is just for you. ONLY you.
smsed kaki. mood is totally down.
had slight fever yesterday. haix
recovered today. then sort of go out.
he cant meet me. but he accompanied me. spiritually.
haas. thanks. u seems to have no complaints.
but i know sometimes u get enough of my nonsense right?
haas. really grateful that u tolerated that. and keep things low. even if u dont like it.
have no idea where we heading to. seems to stuck there.
but will have a way out. ^^ have confidence in you.
a day without sleep.
both of us didnt catch much sleep after what happened.
thought of not going to school for the maintenance.
but peck leng and mookie wanted to meet me, so dragged myself up to meet them
haas. but early in the morning see stunts liao.
my bus went passed the bus stop where there were supposed to be.
but they were not there. so alight at the stop then waited for them.
then saw them holding something. its a cup.
the cup that we gave peck leng for bdae present.
haas. the handle broke sia. lolx.
so sad..~ but its okie. we got it fixed. lolx.
better dont use it. put it as display ba. haas.
then went to school. and found out that yang isnt in school.
handphone off. called house. no1 picked up.
then waited for yang. but still he haven come.
then went up to watched the movie " eye 10 "
i felt dumb!! i asked peck leng to bring and i dint watch!!
idiotic me! cause was discussing about somethings.
then got real upset. but felt alright.
then found out that peck leng is missing.
so went around the school to find her.
-_- still didnt find her. instead we met up with yang to get the stuff for maintenance.
awkard is the word i can used to describe what happened.
then went on to the library. all of us started work.
then was taking the notch out. but unable to do so!!
instead. its stuck in there.
so forget it. then went up to the piano with yang.
haas. think he wanted to play. then went up to play.
first song.~ tong hua!! haas..its so nice. and he taught me how to play!
woot...cool..~ managed to catch up alittle.
second song.~ yu jian. cause hwee min wanted to listen.
haas.not bad too.~
third song.~ i choose de!! Canon in D!!!!!~ my favorite !!!
he played it with remix!!! thats just so cool!! was really happy. cause its so nice~
then fourth song.~ FF song~ haas. he got quite stress remembering how to play.
and fifth song.~ way back into love. first time playing. haas. he asked dory to find the score.
and he managed to figure the first few pieces on his own before he got the score.
and we got tired. and we went down.
i didnt managed to fletch and 1 more arrow is down!!! got 5 arrows down le!! idiot!!
only got 7 arrows. and there is no fletch glue!! omg!
fine. forget it. haas.too lazy anyway.
then went to put back the stuff in the store.
then we went to meet peck leng cause she went for the talk.
heard that it was boring and she practically slpt on the table. lolx..
then walked to causeway. went to long john silver to eat.
dread to eat there. but im hungry. so i ate fries and drank lemon tea.
quite full after eating those. then after that all went home le loe.
cause its going to rain soon~ and some people were tired ba.
tmr pt. so going to die. haix.. rest early ba.! haas.
thursday.
a rest day for me.
slept at 6am. couldnt sleep the whole night.
no idea why. and i slpt till 2 plus.
thats when mookie called to asked me about the fletches and the knots.
i was sian. and mookie later told me that he was irritated by me.
haas. sorry eh..~ ur lucky that i didnt scold you. =X
i would scold people if i felt damn irritated. esp when im sleeping.
then woke up after that. went to bath
then got a missed call. asking if i want fingertap anot.
then asked if i want to join them. then i went ahead.
met them at 6 plus. thought i would be late. but they were more late then me.
and that yang talked nonsense on the phone. damn idiot!
then found out ah zhou also there. didnt expect him to be there. haas.
then reach liao went to Bill Wee house.
wah..that Bill Wee talked. slow sia..~~ then they english damn slang de.
haas. then kept quiet during the time when they discussing.
saw the hot pink fletch. not bad lar the color.
haas. then went back to J8 to eat Subway.
wah!! the cashier damn attitude sia! want to slap her liao.
then peck leng also say the cashier attitude.
haas. then as we talked, we talked about woman and men.
lolx. damn lame lar. the topic we talked on.
then after that wanted to watch movie de.
but ah zhou watched messengers before. then wanted to watch pursuit of happyness.
but J8 dont have.
then thought of going tampanies to watch. so ah zhou went back.
then 3 of us went to take bus to tam.
on the way to the bus interchange. both peck leng and me called our dads to tell them.
haas. then in the end nv go watch movie. lolx.
instead we went to peck leng house to watch Ghost Game.
wah..abit sian lar. but that mookie damn entertaining!
take the big pillow and cover himself. make until himself so warm.
lolx. then throughout the show he does stupid things.
and faced his butt towards me twice! idiot!
i scared he fart loe! -_-
then after the show 12 am liao.
mookie did 1 stupid dumb thing!
i was drinking water and he pushed my head for NO reason!!
then the water spilled on the cushion. damn idiot!
my dad called me up. then he coming to fetch me home.
so went home loe. today kaki smsed me. said will be busy today.
sad. haas. but nvm! jia you! tmr then i sms u..^^
today got a hole in my pocket!
lolx. went to the swenson in airport to treat my family.
lolx..spent about 130+
nvm lar..every1 happy okie le..i also happy.. ^^
then every1 went home. but i dont want to go home
then somehow decided to go to beach.
but had no idea how to go to that particular beach.
haas. cause dont want to keep going to east coast park.
like very sian like that.
then plus kaki wanted to come out to find me.
so went to meet up. then went to the beach.
had fun at the beach. although got sting by mosquitos.
poor kaki~~ *sayang*
picked up a seashell for kaki..
haas. kaki seems to like it and kept it. ^^
and i got tired and there are too many mosquitos.
so decided to get out of the beach.
after that went to wash up. then went to a nearby mall to window shop
haas. went to buy drinks and food to makan.
but i only drink~ while kaki eat nia..
i drink until damn full lar..
drink rootbeer, 1 bottle of mineral water.
and share a Grape Ice Snow with pearl with kaki.
haas. the menu puts"Grap Ice Snow"
good english they have. lolx..
then it taste like the F&N grape with milk~~
lolx.. weird..but still managed to finish up the drink.
something very happening.
haas. kaki suddenly very serious and tell me about something promised.
but found out its something funny. and we both burst out laughing
idiot kaki! make me scare for nothing.
today keep smacking kaki. lolx..
poor kaki..lolx..
promised winnie that i would treat her eat.
so think bringin her to pepper lunch.
the reason why i treat her is because she bring us into this job
and she got lesser salary than us.
so im going to treat her as my dear. and not only these.
also for all the things she did for me.^^
today really very fun with kaki~
hope theres a next time..
haas. and thanks for the 'cap'?
lolx..the cap that kaki gave me.
the fun joy laughter. thanks kaki~
the answer i get from u. somehow is not i want.
but its okie. cause u brought me other things which i never thought u would.
i believed someday. it will be something i wanted.
15 March
first visit to Mookie's house
haas.
before going to his house.
meet yang at Yishun to go to cut hair
haas. called him to give him a wake up call
he asked me to do so.
then went to tampanies to take bus.
took No.39
omg!! went a big round!
thanks yang! intro such a bus to me.
haas. nvm is u wait for me..~~ lolx..
then have to thank my sms kaki.
and sorry ar. have to wake u up so early to pei me talk =X
through the journey peii me talk. lolx. keep me company~
then reach yishun le. went to find soya bean.
and yang thought dou jiang you tiao is dao suan
faint~ lolx..
then bought the soya bean then went to buy sotong tao.
cant find you tiao. so sad!! nvm..
nxt time bring yang go geylang that stall try the you tiao over there ^^
then went to macs to sit down.
had a great meal..! lolx..$2 breakfast meal!
make me so bloated! then slowly go walk walk.
digest food before going to the hairdresser.
..................after cutting, walked towards the mall.
called winnie up to tell her we were done.
then went to meet her.
before meeting winnie, we went to play arcade!
haas. went to play bball!! wahaha
craving to play that.
and guess what. the ball flew out and hit my eyes! T.T
so sad sia. then after that play the table hockey [ think so ]
haas. but cheat money de!! play once nia! and that yang won.. 1-0
arr..!! nxt time!! i will win u!!
haas. then went to play the drum game!
damn dumb lar.!! lolx..yang played until like sian sian like that!
then after that went to meet winnie at the platform liao.
haas. then went to outram to meet up with the rest.
so sad. the hair style i cut hor..they say make my face look rounder!!
T.T so sad..~ nvm..
will grow back de..!! haas
then went Mookie house to play.
i nv play much lar. just went to watch shutter and the host
stupid show! waste my time nia
mookie house that sofa and the pillow in the living room
so NICE!!! >.<
the pillow so huggable!! haas.
and in the end mookie say not clean!!
idiot..i bua so many times le then tell me not clean
damn slow..-_-
forget it.. such a nice day..nvm lar..~ lolx..
hmm...recently listen to 98.7fm
haas got lots of great songs
thats for me nia
haas like Frankie J(feat Baby Bash) Obsession
Its early in the morning
And my heart is really lonely
Just thinkin bout you baby
Got me twisted in the head
And I dont know how to take it
But its driving me so crazy
I dont know if its right
I'm tossin turning in my bed
Its 5 oclock in the morning
And I still cant sleep
Thinkin bout your beauty it makes me
Weak...
I'm feeling hopeless in my home
I dont know what to do but I think I'm in love
Baby...
[Chorus]
Amor, no es amor (if this aint love)
Then what am I feeling (what am I doing wrong)
Amor, no es amor (if this aint love)
Is this an illusion that I have in my heart?
Now I know you're not my lady I'm just tryin to make this right
I dont know what to do I'm going out of my mind
So baby if u let me could I getchu to say maybe we could ride together
We could do this all nite now I dont care if u got a man
Baby I wish you'd understand
Cuz I kno he cant love u right, quite like I can
Its 5 oclock in the morning
And I still cant sleep
Thinkin bout your beauty it makes me
Weak...
I'm feeling hopeless at home
I dont kno what to do but I think I'm in love
[Chorus]
Amor, no es amor (if this aint love)
Then what am I feeling? (what am I doing wrong)
Amor, no es amor (if this aint love)
Is this an illusion that I have in my heart?
I love the way u freaky like that
I love the way u freaky like that
I love the way u freaky like that
Its an obsession
[Baby Bash]
Hold up let me dream
Shorty got me feelin less supreme
Where my candy, where my cream
Got your boy feel less supreme
Hold up wait a minute baby you so damn independent
Loving everything your representing
Got alot of money, I love to spend it
And thats whats up and I dont care what people scream
You're my blessin when I'm stressin
My superfly beauty queen
I'm gonna keep it saucy
Cuz my money know how I do, we go rendez-vous, mi corazon belongs to you
[Chorus]
Amor, no es amor (if this aint love)
Then what am I feeling? (what am I doing wrong) what am I do wrong [echo]
Amor, no es amor (if this aint love)
Is this an illusion that I have in my heart?
Amor, no es amor (if this aint love)
What am I feeling? (what am I doing wrong?) what am I do so wrong? [echo]
Amor, no es amor (if this aint love)
Is this an illusion that I have in my heart?
Amor
and Way Back Into Love!!
its such an amazing song!!
im so in love with it! heres the lyrics.
[ Girl ]I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on
[ Guy ]I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need em again someday
I've been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind
[ Both ]All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
Oh oh oh
[ Girl ] I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's got to be something for my soul somewhere
[ Guy ] I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not just somebody just to get me throught the night
I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions
[ Both ]All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end
[ Girl ] There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation
[ Both ] All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that I'll be there for you in the end
haas. these are the songs that i love right at the moment
today got sunburn!! on my right leg!!!
and this blog thing cant even upload pics
idiot!! might just make me stop blogging.
woo.
tmr going to cut hair loe~~~
and going mookie house to slack~
wahaha..going to jump on his bed to see whether got *ahem*
lolx..actually want to ask him check before he goes to bed.
but nvm lar. later he smack me
lolx! and thanks mookie for the mp3.
the music is so entertaining! -_-
all jap songs. so lullaby~~ make me slp through the whole journey
lolx...thanks anyway ^^
and thanks my sms kaki!
always there to make me feel good
u will always be remembered! ^^
"Hi Sir/Mdm, would you want to take a look at GPS Naviagtion(al) System?"
thats the sentence i had been saying for the past 4 days!
i always say Navigational instead of navigation
haas, but the customers dont even care.
so why bother!!
yesterday sold 2 sets, today also sell 2 sets!
woot!!
so happy. lucky i dont have penalty!! happy sia!
wahaha!!! then now my aunt bugging me to treat her to swenson..~
haas
so maybe going to treat my family with my pay ba
since i never buy the mp3 in the end
second day of work
working as a promoter
for TIBO!! a GPS navigation system
cant imagine that i had said that a million times
and kana dao hundreds times!
omg! that is so saddening
second day le
still couldnt sell any 1 of the products
so SAD!!!
my team all managed to sell at least 1 each except me and hm
but will still continue to try!
TMR!! must at least sell 1!!!
my CUSTOMERS!! PLEASE! Please do come back!!!
all say come back but all nv did!!
haas.
then yesterday ah zhou came to find us~
woot! got drinks to drink! thanks
and today there was Khai to treat us drinks!!
arent they sweet?!
lolx..!! really thanks a BUnch!!! ^^
tmr shall JIA YOU!! Gee^^
its been quite draggy day for me
especially these 2 days
got news that my uncle was admitted into the hospital
theres a clot in his brain
was in a coma since last night
but fortunately he woke up tonight
was really really glad..!!
then had no much idea what they going to do
haix
really hope that uncle is going to be okay
really thanks to my sms kaki
had been with me through the time when im in the hospital
was feeling really really uneasy in the hospital
dont like the feeling in there
and thanks my Friend!! =)
for talking with me even when ur damn tired ^^
u 2 really cheered me up! grateful!
